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Have an elderly relative say you should be a chef instead of a programmer  and respond with:

Carmelita Grace Seeber I would never have the discipline for cleanliness.  I can do a weekend here or there, and in  close knot family we all share germs anyway, but I have a feeling running a restaurant, I would poison somebody!

Besides, only about 8 out of 10 of my gourmet experiments come put edible.

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