Rules to go over with my son

Rules for my son:
1.  Do not drink away from where you have a safe bed for the night.  That means home, buddy.
2.  Do not go to parties that are not chaperoned.
3.  Do not go on dates unchaperoned.
4.  While I've encouraged you to be heterosexual, in this day and age you can't touch a girl without a written and notarized agreement first detailing the relationship.  Sheldon Cooper is right.  You need a relationship agreement.

It's the only way to be safe thanks to the so-called sexual revolution.

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